A food addict's travels on the road to recovery.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Breaking Free

I'm on Day 5 of quitting smoking, and dare I say, it's getting a little easier?  Dwayne and I used the gum for the first 3 days and it really didn't seem to be much help at all.  I kept breaking down into crying fits every time I wanted to smoke and couldn't...and felt like I just wanted to crawl out of my skin.  It was a seriously miserable feeling.  Then Dwayne told me that quitting smoking is just as hard and just as addictive as heroine.  That's NOT what I needed to hear.  Obviously the withdrawals weren't as hideous as I would assume heroine withdrawals are....but they were bad enough that I knew I never wanted to do Day One over again...ever. 

On the afternoon of Day 3, I went to Wal-mart on the advice of a friend and bought their brand of nicotine patches.  My friend told me her husband quit smoking 3 years ago with the help of these specific patches...she said there was no need to buy the more expensive brand name patches.  So I slapped one on yesterday morning...Day 4.  Not to say that it wasn't still a difficult day...especially being surrounded by 3 other smokers here at work....but I can DEFINITELY say that it was worlds easier than with the gum.  It was an amazing difference, for sure.  I was much calmer yesterday than when chewing the gum.

Things are still difficult today...if I let my mind wander to a cigarette for more than a few seconds my chest starts to tighten and the anxiety comes on pretty fast, so I try to busy myself with something else and stay pre-occupied for other things.  Of course, it's not helping that I've already been at work for an hour and a half and haven't had a single insurance claim come through my email yet this morning!!  I need some work!!

I have also noticed that I'm eating more....I was afraid that whole hand-to-mouth habit was going to get me, and it has.  I bought scale batteries and got on yesterday morning.  Things are worse than I thought.  So bad, that I can't bring myself to report my weight today.  Give me a couple of weeks to get past the difficulty of the quitting smoking, and then I'll get back to reporting my weight.  "First things first"...one of Leslie's AAisms.  Thanks Leslie.  :)

A co-worker, William, came in this morning and stopped at my desk to ask how I'm doing.  I smiled a big smile and said, "I'm on Day 5.....I really think I'm going to make it this time...I'm going to be a non-smoker!"  He smiled back, raised a triumphant fist in the air, and said, "I love your confidence!  Oh, and, you ARE a non-smoker."  Hmmm....yeah....I guess I am.  Have a great day friends.  :)

15 comments:

  1. I'm sure it's tough but it has to be worth it. Think of all the money you'll save on cigarettes!

    My dad smoked since he was 18 and just quit two years ago cold turkey. I was so proud of him but I know it's tough.

    You can do this. You ARE doing this.

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  2. You can do this!!! I know how strong you are...and you can and are doing this!!!! :) And like William said, you are already a non-smoker! Keep it up, Girl!!! :)

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  3. Go Girl you can do this, I am so proud of you xxxx

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  4. I'm so behind you Tammy...............One Day At A Time M/F. ((( hugs)))

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  5. You CAN do this look at how far you have cone already. Keep it up Tammy!

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  6. If you can do this yuo can do anything! :)

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  7. You ARE going to make it this time. And when you do you will feel so empowered and confident of your ability to do good things for yourself that the food will be easier. I feel it. And then you can help me!! hahaha

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  8. Gum! Get lots of gum so you have something to do with your mouth rather than smoke or eat. Keep a waterbottle handy at all time too. Good for you, I wish you success!

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  9. You really, truly will bounce back!!! You are doing a fabulous thing in quitting and you'll be so happy...hope you get to that point soon! :)

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  10. Do I have to lecture you again? How about if I send you a close-up shot of the wrinkles on my face and my neck that looks like a vagina, all from smoking (oh, and getting old).
    Don't touch them! and run ice cold water on those hands when you get the urge to smoke. The urge will leave. Don't substitute food either. Or I'm sending you a corgi.
    BTW, I'd be happy to get you a copy of her photo sticking out of the back of the car. It was a cute one.

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  11. 'every journey starts with one step' You have already taken 5 girl.....look at you!!! WTG!!! My husband used the patches too, they do help a lot. I think they come in different strengths if needed. YOU CAN DO THIS! Oh andlet me know when your new business website is up,k...later gator

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  12. yea for you.!!!!! I hope the patches work.... I think sugar free gum chewing will help too. My mom smoked for 30 years and was able to quit but she chewed gun and ate lifesavers the whole time....you might even need something to keep your fingers occupied too...get your self some pretty pink and blue and green pens ,play with rubber bands, gum chewing. This is tough stuff but so worth it.

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  13. candy...hard candy..my mom used lemon drops. You can cut down the eating with gum and hard candy...if you have something in your mouth, you won't want to put anything in there anyways. Great job! And if you aren't smoking you are a non-smoker.

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  14. I am sooo proud of you and Dwayne!!! This is wonderful news, Tammy, and I'm probably posting this on DAY 6! ya hooo for you.

    Good to keep that in mind, that day 1 was so bad you don't ever want to do it over again. I mean, you have 6 days under you belt, gf! Keep adding days! One at a time!

    And just concern yourself with being a non smoker one hour at a time.

    Love n hugs, Chrissy

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