A food addict's travels on the road to recovery.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Self-Sabotage??

Super short post.  I don't know what's up with me today.  I have been sooooo tired and lethargic and I woke up wanting to eat everything in the house.  Don't know why.  Nothing particulary crazy going on in my life right now (but then I ask myself on most days, how much crazier can it get????!!!)  I managed to keep my calories at 1800, which feels somewhat miraculous, because I've been fighting my food thoughts all day.  Get this.  My mom even called to chat for a while and told me that her and my sister were going out to lunch today at the Chinese buffet....and I was welcome to join them.  Holy crap.....oh that took some real restraint.  Can you believe I said no??  I still can't believe I turned down Chinese, of all things.  But I did.  So yay for me, and on an especially difficult day.  Got in a good, hard workout at the gym tonight with Billie.  Still working on getting the water in for today....6 glasses so far, 6 glasses to go before bedtime.

I'm starting to wonder if I have some weirdo mental hang-up about getting below 230.  I seem to keep bouncing between 230 & 239....I've jumped up and down between those numbers a couple of different times now.  It strikes me as odd.  I can't think of why the 220's would scare the crap out of me, or why I'd have some kind of self-sabotage thing going on, but that's the major hurdle I'm trying to concentrate on right now.  I want to see the 220's, and NEVER see 230 again.  That's my next goal.  Wish me well friends. :)

Quote For the Day:

"Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them.  You will find that they don't have half the strength you think they have."  -Norman Vincent Peale

15 comments:

  1. Turning down Chinese buffet is a HUGE NSV.

    Have you thought about breaking up with the scale for a while? That way you still exercise and eat right but have no idea what those crazy numbers are doing. You may be in the 220s or maybe not. No self sabotage. Then when you step on the scale, surprise! You've lost weight. :) Just an idea.

    Don't be afraid of the 220s. They're but a small stepping stone on the way to the 190s. You're just passing through them.

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  2. The 220's are a lot nicer than the 230's. They are a decade closer to Onderland...it's calling your name. Taaaaammmmmmyyyyyy....come to Onderland!

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  3. Excellent courage to turn down the buffet! Certainly, you might THINK it would have taken more courage to go, but only eat sensibly. However, it would have been easy to just "go along". Alcoholics, I would have to imagine, aren't allowed to accept invitations to the bar, but only have a club soda (or at least until they've gone through the whole program).

    I can't go to buffets...any of them. I may never be able to go. I don't know. I have shown massive amounts of restraint in all sorts of situations, but I also have no issue saying no to situations and environments riddled with failure.

    So my dear, you can't come off that victory and then also concern yourself with self-sabotage. Sure, maybe something else is afoot, but your courage is not in question here.

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  4. If it's any consolation, I felt crappy the rest of the day after I went to Chinese buffet last week, and I didn't even eat nearly as much as I'm capable of. I guess after a couple months of mostly reasonable eating, my body doesn't want piles of buffet food so much anymore. I don't think I'll be back there for quite a while.

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  5. I laughed so hard at your comment about Dwayne on my post... thanks for that (I REALLY needed a chuckle)! Way to go on staying strong even with the invitation to Chinese food!

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  6. wow you did great..i am so happy that you are doing better..i was reading the other posts and it seems like you had a really tough time this last couple of weeks..i know things will get better for you..you keep it up...im rooting for you too...loveya,kelli

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  7. Yep, very good on the buffet.
    AND an awesome quote.
    Out them all together....great post today!

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  8. Hello! Just found your blog today, via Jenn! Congrats on all your success! Especially keeping your cals in line on a day when you were tired and sugar driven! That always happens to me - I mean, I'm always sugar driven, but it's extremely intensified when I don't sleep well.
    Alright, well, I'm glad I found your blog and will keep up with ya :)

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  9. I would have RAN to the buffet if I felt like you did, so yay for saying no to Chinese!!!
    I hope you feel better - keep up the good fight, you're doing great.

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  10. Hey, Tammy! I hear you on wondering about the resistance or issue about getting below a certain number. I guess the best thing to do is just try and stay in the day, and the mysteries will hopefully unravel as we stay the course.

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  11. I'm starting to wonder if I have some weirdo mental hang-up about getting below 230. I seem to keep bouncing between 230 & 239

    Girl I hear you. I keep bouncing between the same numbers. Just keep on trucking...

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  12. I'm so glad to hear that I'm not alone on this! I too seem to have a mental hang up/self sabotage thing going on with getting below a certain number. What's up with that??? So annoying and discouraging. I'm not giving up though! And neither are you. Keep at it, I know you can break through.
    Huge congrats on the not going out for chinese buffet!Not sure I would have been able to hold out on that one.

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  13. Forget about the plateau, you can get beyond it. My friend did with hypnosis also quit smoking too.

    I lost 30 pounds all fat, doing this routine. As far as exercise I did 3 mornings of cardio for about 45 mins. alternating with 90 mins. of light weight lifting the other 3 days. Sunday off.

    In order to lose weight I ate 5 to 6 small meals (300 to 500 calories each) and did juicing for 2 of those. I never eat the same caloric content for each day. I think calorie shifting fools your body into thinking its not on a diet. Start your first meal at 7am and the last one at 5pm. Only drink water after 5pm. Throw in a little morning aerobics to rev up the metabolism for the rest of the day. Don't forget to clean your pipes before starting a weight loss program - more info here: http://www.thefinalpound.com

    One more thing, for motivation I took very revealing photos of myself in my underwear and posted these on the fridge, mirrors, car dash, etc. I also wrote my body fat measurement on these pictures. Take pictures once each month to see your progress, This works!! Also, journal your progress and adjust exercise and diet as necessary.

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  14. Good job turning down the Chinese buffet! The food is never as good as you think it's going to be anyway.

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