A food addict's travels on the road to recovery.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Someone Noticed

Still trying to focus on the positive during my "blah" week. This actually happened a few days ago and I just haven't reported the good news yet.

I went by the apartment complex that I just moved from a month ago to pay the final utility bill. I walked in the office to give Christy the check. As soon as I opened the door, before I even made it down the hall to her office, I heard her exclaiming, "OMG Tammy, look at you!!! I walked in to her office and said, "Look at what?". She saw me through her office window walking up the sidewalk. She was FREAKING OUT at how much weight I've lost.

She went on and on, telling me how fantastic I looked, with this incredibly shocked look on her face. Her mouth was hanging open, jaw nearly hitting the floor. I kind of half-smiled, half shook my head, quite perplexed. I told her I just saw her a month ago...why was she acting like she hadn't seen me in a year?? She said she sees a tremendous difference from a month ago. Still perplexed, I told her I really hadn't lost that much more since the last time I saw her, less than 10 lbs. in fact.

According to her I look way smaller than a month ago. I know what the scale says, so the only thing I can figure is maybe all the walking I'm doing every day is causing me to lose a lot of inches?? Who knows....but her shock and amazement and continuous gushing over my appearance was very uplifting.

I also posted some progress pics and pics from my Cherokee trip on my Facebook page. I got a few nice replies to those as well, and that made me feel great, too. Another cool thing is I got a message from a friend from grade school today that found me on Facebook about a month or so ago. Her name is Cherie, and she let me know she's been reading my blog every day and is really enjoying it. I didn't even know she knew about my blog!! So....HI CHERIE!!! Thanks for reading girl!

Cherie made a comment that she wished she had the same willpower as me. I'd like to tell her, and anyone else reading, that I don't know if it really comes down to willpower. It comes down to a decision, or as Jack Sh*t called it in one of his awesome posts, A Day of Reckoning. Make sure you find him on my blogroll and find that post in his archives if you haven't read it yet. It's life-changing for those of you sitting on the fence. One day, I just got tired.

I got tired of being obese, of watching my health deteriorate at a high rate of speed, of being on so many meds, of seriously thinking about my own mortality. I got tired of wondering if I was going to be around long enough to watch my nieces and nephews grow up and if I was going to be healthy enough to be any help to my parents as they age. I got tired of being the fat girl, and all the heartache that goes along with it. I got tired of being tired. I was ready. Ready for a new life, a new goal, a new me.

So I made the decision to get the weight off and that was it. There IS no turning back. It's simply not an option. I've lost weight before, and gained some of it back. I didn't do it in a healthy way. I just ate way too few calories and exercised my butt off. My eating habits didn't evolve into healthy ones. I didn't learn anything about nutrition. I didn't do anything that would lead to a lifetime change....permanent weight loss and maintenance for the rest of my life.

This time is different. Now I'm doing it the right way. I made The Decision. This is the last time I will ever have to lose weight. I am making changes in my eating habits that have become part of who I am now. What I crave is changing to healthier things. Things that I once loved as an obese person, I now almost find repulsive. I'm working out the mental/emotional things that led to my obesity in the first place as I go along. Each day that I take a walk and get my body moving, I'm getting a little stronger. I'm building endurance.

I am on the road to freedom. The great thing about this road is that there's room for everyone. Anyone and everyone that wants to change their life for the better....the path is waiting. And the really cool thing about this particular path to Freedom, is it travels right through the middle of Blogland. So many wonderful, brilliant, endearing, strong, encouraging people traveling with you. It helps to know you're not alone. The road isn't always smooth...it gets rough and bumpy in some spots. But it is most definitely a road worth taking....because what's waiting at the end....freedom....has GOT to be one of the best feelings in the world. Can't wait to get there. :)

Pam provided me with today's quote...it's just fabulous. :)

Quote For the Day:

"Miracles start to happen when you give as much energy to your dreams as you do to your fears." -Richard Wilkins


  1. Oh Yes a fabulous quote!! I love it.

    I LOVE you post too, Awesome is the word to describe it. The Freedom Road is a Great Place to travel and I am honoured to be on the road with you and as you said some wonderful people heading in the same direction helping and encouraging every step of the way.

    The reaction from Christy is understandable. When you are losing weight and people see you everyday, they don't see the loss. But when some hasn't seen you for a few weeks they can see. We had that reaction up in Scotland this week and it is such a boost.
    You are a leader on this road and and a delight to follow Tammy my girl:)



  2. Congratulations! I'm so happy for you that people are noticing. (I'm hoping that will happen to me one day soon). I am totally with you on the Decision. There is something about a rock-hard resolve that is just different from "willpower".

  3. There is a point where weight loss becomes obvious. Kind of like, no one noticed at a loss of 26 lbs but they will notice on pound 27. Weird.

    You know how pregnant women go from not showing to being huge overnight? You'll see a girl and you can't tell she's expecting but then you see her two days later and her stomach is huge?

    Weight loss is like that I think. You lose and no one sees and then, all of the sudden, you hit a certain number and your body looks different and people can tell. At 21 lbs lost, no one but my family has said anything about my losing weight. And I think they only THINK they notice because they KNOW I'm changing my life. What I'm looking forward to is the day when someone says, "Ohhhh...Brittany...wow!" I wonder what number will get me some notice? I'm vain enough to WANT that!

    And Tammy, I am all for riding a roller coaster with you. Wouldn't that be a cool way to meet and treat our new skinny selves? I am so sorry you had to walk away from a ride like that. Makes me sad!

  4. Of course someone noticed...you look GREAT!! This was a really good post today. You've come a long way baby! Keep up the great work.

  5. Fantastic! How inspirational. And what a great boost to have others noticing. I'm with you, girl. This is it for me. I'm not doing this again. If I never lose another pound, I'm still down 23 and will not go back. But I'm in for the duration this time, however long getting to goal takes. And then I'm in for the maintenance. Glad to be on the journey with you.

  6. Awesome that she noticed and gave you such positive feedback! I really believe that exercise changes your body in ways that the scale doesn't necessarily show...and you are living proof of that!

  7. Awesome blossom! You're moving right along! And I love that quote!! I'm inspired to maybe hang it in one of my classrooms... :)

  8. That is so awesome! It is so nice when people notice and say something! I makes all the hard work worth it!:)

  9. Great insight! I liked the part of working out the issues/emotions/ that caused the over eating in the first place. It's a lot to work through and I like how blogging daily allows me to figure it out one day at a time. Great, great post!

  10. Sometimes it is not all about the actual pounds lost, it's about the look and feel of the pounds melting away. Great job!! You know you're doing well when people begin to comment.

  11. Wonderful post, Tammy. Losing weight is such a comples issue...emotional, physical and mental. I have some Lane Bryant pants that are now too big for me. We all know, that when you are losing weight, you can change sizes rapidly. I have two pair of dress pants, and one pair of jeans. All are part of the "Right Fit" pants at Lane Bryant stores. All 3 pair are BLUE DOT~Size 5 ~Petite. I will send them to whoever would like them, just email me. Great going Tammy! Hugs, Kathleen

  12. That IS a great quote!

    Maybe you should start taking measurements along with weighing yourself. Like, once every two weeks take new measurements because those can be really motivating as well, especially if you get to a plateau.

  13. Tammy, how awesome for you! Im so proud of you!

    I have something for you, check it out at:

  14. That's fantastic that someone noticed you've lost the weight... doesn't that just make you feel great? Like all your hard work is finally paying off. It almost validates our hard work. Your pictures look great.

  15. I'm so glad that someone noticed, and that they told you about it! Congrats.

  16. Congrats on the attention!!! Just more motivation to keep you on the right track!

  17. I love this post! I am having such a shitty moment/day...okay actually week and I got teary reading your post. Thank you! I love reading blogs and I have been skipping my daily reads lately and I just realize I need them! They help keep me sane. Thanks a bunch Tammy!