A food addict's travels on the road to recovery.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Weekend Warrior

I battled all of the bad weekend eating that I normally go through...and I won!! A few of you asked me on another post about whether or not I could talk to Dwayne about not eating so badly when he's with me on Fridays and Saturdays. Let me explain our situation as best as I can.

Dwayne is 100% supportive of me losing the weight for my health, especially because we are both diabetic. However, he just isn't interested in losing any of his weight. He's too attached to his bacon double cheeseburgers and racks of baby back ribs. He and I have been dating for 5 years now and we do not live together. Sometimes I see him one weeknight, and then I see him on Friday nights when he stays over and we spend all day Saturday together.

I talk about my blog to him all the time. He is very well aware of what I'm trying to do. And although I can tell that he feels bad about wanting to eat crap in front of me....he still eats it. We just do not eat the same things. A few things we do, but not for the most part. For one thing, he does not eat veggies....aside from a little lettuce and a thin slice of tomato on his bacon double cheeseburger, but that's about it.

I've been cooking for him on the weekends for many years now. I just don't feel comfortable stopping cold turkey and telling him to go out to a restaurant and buy something for all of his meals now when he's with me. So I'm trying to teach myself to ignore the smell and looks of his yummy, calorie-laden foods, and just eat what I've got here for myself.

I told myself this weekend was going to be different from all the others. I swear to you, it takes me all week long of busting my a$$ with exercise and shaving off calories every day for a week to not gain, or only lose 1 lb. I know if I ate right all week, including weekends, I could lose much more. I was ready for another good loss this week, so I called Dwayne on Friday before he got here. This is how the conversation went:

Me: I'm going grocery shopping, and I know you always say not to spend my grocery money on you....that you don't want anything....but PLEASE tell me something I can get you so we don't have a repeat of last weekend where you decide you're starving at midnight and we end up going to the IHOP.

Dwayne: I really can't think of anything I want baby. Don't worry about me.

Me: Pizza rolls? Stouffer's french bread pizzas? Chocolate chip cookies? Potato chips? Tell me something Dwayne....you need to say something.

Dwayne: Okay, get me some pizza rolls.

So, I did my shopping, and got him some pizza rolls and a few other things, and we got through Friday night just fine. I came in at 1497 calories, eating all of my healthy foods and no junk and I got 3 miles of walking in that morning...very pleased!!

Last Saturday, I asked him if we could take Scarlette and go walk the 2 mile trail at the park. He HATES exercise, never does any, and I figured if I could sneak in at least 2 miles (instead of my normal 3), then that's better than nothing. He said yes, and he lazed around the house all day and we never went. I was very disappointed. So.....THIS Saturday, I told him I'm going for a hike and would he like to go with me? I didn't ask, and give the day a chance to slip away....I simply told him I was going....and he came along. We hiked an easy trail called the Allatoona Pass, which is part of the Civil War battlegrounds. I know he's a huge Civil War/history buff, so this was an excellent choice. We ended up walking 3 miles, and he actually enjoyed himself, constantly commenting on how beautiful the woods were.

Here's the rest of Friday's phone conversation regarding Sat's dinner plans:

Me: I was thinking we could grill some chicken for me and some italian sausages for you for dinner on Saturday night. Is that cool?

Dwayne: (hemming and hawing....acting like he either didn't want chicken & sausages, or he was going to be too lazy to do the grilling)

I stepped in.....Me: It's either we grill out, or you can drop $50 for us to go to dinner at the Appalachian Grille.

Dwayne: Grilled chicken sounds great baby! Forget the sausages, I don't need those....let's grill some chicken.

(When the going gets tough, hit 'em where it hurts, the wallet, lol)

Here's how a full day of eating went with Dwayne on Saturday:


Me: 1/2 c. of cottage cheese and a banana
Dwayne: scrambled eggs, bacon, biscuits


Me: big turkey sandwich on sourdough w/ tomatoes, dill pickles & banana peppers
Dwayne: plate full of Pizza Rolls


Me: grilled chicken breast, grilled mushrooms & onions, 1 c. of watermelon
Dwayne: grilled chicken sandwich on sourdough, a whole box of noodles, 3 c. watermelon


Me: 53 calorie Russel Stover sugar-free chocolate mint
reduced fat mozzarella cheesestick
2 c. decaf coffee w/ sugar-free hazelnut creamer

Dwayne: 1/2 bag of potato chips, chocolate chip & peanut butter cookies, Coke

I'm very, very pleased with myself for staying on track with my eating both days. Today wasn't so hot...I did some mindless eating late in the afternoon around 5pm, and before I knew it I was sitting at 1579 calories and hadn't even eaten a real dinner. So I stopped eating for the day....no real dinner for me. I shouldn't have been so stupid with my calories. I'm 79 over for the day, but I've gotta' tell ya'.....last Sunday I was probably over by 600. So I can deal with the 79, especially knowing I came in under the last 2 days. Friday was 1497 & Saturday was 1460...with 3 miles of exercise on all 3 days so far.

About the progress pics, you people kill me, lol. Thank you so very much for all of your very kind words. It was so much more than I was expecting. Several of you mentioned that my shirt looked way too big. That kills me, because I just bought that shirt at Cato's that morning!!! It's a 22/24. I just don't feel like I'm ready for an 18/20 yet because I'm scared it will hug my fat rolls, and that is one thing I can NOT stand....especially when I sit down and all the fat spreads out. I'm telling you...that shirt I'm wearing is covering up a HUGE stomach. That's where most of my weight is....if you knew what I looked like naked, you'd totally understand, lol. My best friend Pam thinks I'm ready for a smaller size, and it won't feel tight like I'm thinking. I don't have any more money to buy anymore clothes with right now, but I decided when I hit my next 15 lb. goal and have 45 lbs gone, then I'm going out to try on some 18/20's and we'll see how they fit. Hopefully I'll be comfy in them by then.

It's been a super fantastic weekend and I'm so very proud of myself. I'm not going to pretend that eating cottage cheese while he was eating bacon and eggs was easy, because it wasn't. But I was focused....I knew that a big loss was more important to me than eating 1/2 lb of bacon, so I stayed on plan. I knew that if I could just get to Friday's weigh-in, then I'd be proud of the effort I put forth while he was sucking down all of those calories in front of me. I'm glad he was willing to go on the hike with me....it made it much more enjoyable. I'm happy all the way around....except for eating too much before dinner tonight, thus not having a normal dinner. Stupid mindless snacking. Oh well...lesson learned. I'll be watching that much more closely from now on. I don't like being over my calorie limit, and I don't like having them all used up by 5:30pm when I'm usually up til midnight.

One last note about the pics. When I read everyone's comments, and I kept hearing where the shirt was too big, I pulled up the post again and looked at the pics more closely. It was then that I noticed that my left ta-ta was trying to escape out of the front of my shirt. I am so embarassed. I truly apologize to anyone who was offended by that...I really wasn't trying to be crude, and actually got a little miffed at Dwayne. He was the one who took the pics and you'd think he could of told me that my cleavage was out of control....but he didn't say a word. Guess he was too busy enjoying the view. Dork. lol

Hope everyone has had a fabulous weekend, too. Going to go catch up on everyone else's blogs now! :)

Quote For The Day:

"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself." -Hecato, Greek philosopher


  1. Congratulations on the great job this weekend! I know it had to take a lot of fortitude to resist those goodies, because I have to do it a lot too!

  2. You're becoming more assertive for yourself in a non-offensive way and that's wonderful. You may just get some veggies down his guzzle yet, Tammy!
    Congratulations on being strong and staying strong.

  3. And I meant to also say...your pictures are super fabulous!!!! When I look at my comment, it doesn't come across very clearly that I'm talking about the nummy foods that our guys are eating that we have to resist! For me today it was bacon at breakfast, and gravy on pork roast and apple pie for dessert that I did not indulge in. Thank God that apple pie is almost gone.

  4. I'm betting you'll get to a point where you make what you want and if he wants to eat it he will and if not, well, he won't. You are too kind making two meals. Seriously, waaaaay too kind.

  5. OMG Tammy - the ta-ta remark had me laughing loud enough to wake Daniel up!! LOL

    I have a feeling when you get those 18/20's that I am going to be doing my told you so dance for you YET AGAIN....

    You are doing this! Love you for it, too!

  6. I'm so impressed with how you handled eating and exercise with Dwayne this weekend! Love that you are putting your needs first without being mean or judgmental about the way he eats and doesn't really exercise. Who knows, maybe what you are doing will rub off on him - way to set a good example, Tammy!

  7. I admire the fact that you don't cave in to other's dietary desires. Keep up the good work, the progress is OBVIOUS.

  8. Well, I for one enjoyed the cleavage. Has you looking quite sexy. ;)

    You did awesome this weekend. That takes a great amount of will power, I'm sure, to eat that well when someone else is eating a lot of much tastier things in front of you.

    But you know, after a while you should just tell him you're not gonna do all this making two separate meals. I like to eat pretty healthy, and I do all the cooking for me and my boyfriend. So every week I make a menu of all the meals and snacks I'm going to have (yeah, I'm anal like that), and a good 85% of it is healthy stuff. If Josh doesn't like something I prepare, he doesn't eat, or he has to scrounge around for something to make on his own. Harsh, maybe, but as a result he eats a lot healthier, and he's starting to like more of what I make.

  9. Well done You!!!

    You handled the weekend Brilliantly. You are asserting yourself and your food needs in a non-combative way with Dwayne and I am sure it is going to pay off goodstyle. You may begin to influence him about his health and eating habits as he see's your success.

    Your hike sounds great, I hope sometime in the future to do some hiking in the USA. You have whetted my appetite.



  10. Good for you...you are doing great and looking awesome tammy!!

  11. OMG Tammy ! I can't beleive those pics!!! You look like you lost so much more than 30 pounds! You look AMAZING ! Words can not match the statment those pictures make! You look like a different person - an absolute transformation! I hope you can see it as well as we do, since you see yourself everyday.
    Your fighting the good fight, AND WINNING !!
    Your Amazing!

  12. I am speechless! Truly. Your progress pictures are incredible! It does look like you have lost way more than 30 pounds. Personally I liked the cleavage shot, it was very runway modelesque.:-)
    And I agree with Amy H. You are being waaaay too kind fixing two separate meals the way you do.
    And good for you staying strong on the weekend!!
    Weekends are always hard for me too because my husband eats differently than I do. It does get easier with practice though, so stick with it.
    And finally, thank you so much for your incredibly sweet comments!
    It was nice to know I was missed.:-)
    Keep up with the walking girl, I walked for a really long time before I ever thought of running, and still do on weekends. Consistent walking will get you the results you are looking for!!

  13. You handled the weekend perfectly! Your pictures are wonderful. I really can't believe there is that much of a difference in 30 pounds. You are losing it in all the right places, which is something that didn't happen to me at 30 pounds!! Lucky you.

  14. You know, I think everyone is right. I think you are ready to go down a size!!! It can be hard to believe. We don't want to get a smaller size and not realize that we look stupid...and fat...and uncomfortable. But I don't think you'll have that problem. And you know, I guess if I think about it, Dwayne's eating badly in front of you can really build up your willpower. I've been tested this weekend by my husband. He's been eating so badly!

  15. Really well done Tammy! It always makes me angry when partners are so unsupportive in the act even if they are giving it lipservice. Now that he sees you're not going to let him sabotage your efforts I'm sure things will get easier. And it's a massive bonus that he enjoyed the walk as he's much more likely to want to do it again.

    You really have made a breakthrough. A great achievement.

    Stay strong,
    Bearfriend xx

  16. Great job on the weekend!! Handled like a real pro. However, after reading the entire post, you really got me laughing with the ta-ta remark. Hadn't even noticed!!

  17. It's great that you are able to maintain your plan while your boyfriend eats the tempting foods at the same time. You are very strong; I don't think I could do that on a regular basis. In fact it has been one of my pitfalls in past weight loss attempts. My husband sounds just like Dwayne in his likes and dislikes, but I am slowly getting him onboard this time and he really is being a good sport about it finally.

    I also wanted to say thank you for your comment on my post on (uncontrolled) portion control. I value everyone's remarks and am truly appreciative for each thing that people have to say, but the very end of yours actually brought tears to my eyes. I can't tell you how much it meant to me that you wrote that, but I do want you to at least know that you made a big difference to someone. Thank you.

  18. You have done a great job handeling the weekend situation! GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!